A quick catch-up.

It's been a while.

It hasn’t escaped my notice that it’s been nearly a year since my last post, when I completed the second draft of Martyrs of Ash. Having done so, I then put aside the draft and worked awhile on worldbuilding and outlining ready for the next. A few months later, I began the third draft. Then life happened.

Social media - which I struggle to keep up with at the best of times - is the first thing to fall through the cracks when I’m overwhelmed. I have medicated metal health struggles and unmedicated neurodivergence to manage on top of the usual day-to-day being-an-adult-human things. When my personal life becomes unstable, when the world is on fire and humans lay bare the worst of their violent inclinations, I have to be careful about my relationship with social media. I tread a fine line between needing to remain informed and spiralling into some very dark places. When the latter happens, every bit of energy I have is spent keeping myself afloat.

In the midst of that, posting on the internet is the last thing I’m able to do.

But I’ve still been working on my book, albeit slowly, for most of those months. Writing helps. Since I was a child I’ve carried a lot of anger and pain, and since I was a child writing has been an necessary outlet for it all.

Writing this book helps. Writing about underdogs surviving and resisting injustices helps.

I’m also very lucky to have some wonderful human beings in my life. I am beyond grateful for the writing group I am a part of and the friendships there, for all the encouragement and faith and solidarity. They have kept me treading water when I could have easily floundered.

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Refilling the creative well.

Something I want - and I know I need - to do a lot more of this year is consuming media that inspires me. Music and gaming have always been the things that fuel my writing, but I also need to allow more time for reading and watching films or shows instead of cramming every available minute with “I should be writing because I’m taking too fucking long to finish this book”.

• Currently reading: The Darkness That Comes Before by R. Scott Bakker.

It’s brutal, it’s philosophical, and it’s confusing. The worldbuilding is vast, and there’s so many names and factions with very little explanation as to what anything is. Most the characters are despicable and the world shits on just about everyone.

But I love it. It challenges me as a reader and inspires me to be a better writer. Definitely check content warnings before going in though. It isn’t for everyone.

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The actual writing update.

I’ve been making consistent progress on draft three and have just passed 80,000 words with Chapter 13 of ~45.

The rest of the draft needs a lot more work than the first part. It’s going to take longer and it’s going to be more difficult. I’ve also had to accept that it won’t look as pretty either. That’s fine. It just needs to be done, and I’m happy that I’m able to keep showing up. I’m currently on day 39 of writing everyday. For me, considering my unrelenting difficulties with consistency, that alone is a win I’m proud of.

(My previous record of everyday writing was over 180 days. I lost it when I binged Elder Scrolls Online all day and forgot to write.)

Experience has taught me caution when it comes to setting deadlines for myself, but apparently not enough to really temper my optimism, as I still want to finish this draft within the year. I remember having similar goals at the beginning of the second draft, which ended up taking nearly four years.

But life was different then, and I don’t have half as much work to do with this draft as with the last. I am also surrounded by people who have put their faith in me and my abilities, and that makes all the difference.

Thank you for being here.